Frustration

[Yian]

Year 2008 is almost over, and I still don't feel like I have accomplished anything. My portfolio has some good pieces but not nearly enough, and even the best work i have is outranked by some other artists. I am getting really depressed and my fear grows that I will live a mediocre life.

At the portfolio night, things looked slightly better. Many people pretty much have nothing but crap (sorry) to show, and their chance for getting any job or publicity was below zero (sorry), but there were two or maybe three artists really stand out, and although to the untrained eyes my work simply has a different style and subject matter, these people's works do have far superior composition and their strokes shows a confidence that my works lack.

I wonder, how come they are so far ahead of me? I understand that these are just few people, less than a dozen maybe, that really best me. But when I put my works on the Internet, it is no where near top 100. There are just so many people out there doing so many amazing works and getting so much recognition. I think I work really hard and sometimes I stay up many nights to create the best work possible, but there are still people better than me in a way that I don't even know how they achieved their results.

I am beginning to fear that this is where I stop at my life... a decent sized crowd liking my work, instead of being the best of the best. :(

I am really frustrated right now. I told myself that at next years show, I am going to be the booth that has the best stuff, which means I have one years to polish my work ans surpass the quality I have witnessed this year. But I am not sure if I could make it.

Well, at least their business cards all sucked. People really liked my business cards. They ran out in 20 minutes, and I did get a possible commission for an advertisement campaign.

Thank you for reading the stupid rant and now to compensate your time wasted, here is a cute picture:

http://img201.imageshack.us/img201/1103/cuteanimal4467257vz8.jpg

[schnitzel_bob]

Ah Yian, you truly are priceless.

[farsimon]

is that your hamster that died?

[IcedEarth]

Well, one thing about life is that there are ALWAYS going to be people that are better than you, no matter HOW good you are. So... don't get discouraged just because you're not at the front of the pack. Be proud of what you've done and how hard you have worked. I think the problem here is that you're basing your idea of what a "good life" is, too much on other people. As you said, those that you think are superior to you are such because their strokes reflect their confidence, correct? So then would it not make sense that if you took more pride in your own work, based on how hard you've worked, the result would be you feeling more confident, which would then be reflected in your work?

Basically, what I'm getting at is that before you start worrying too much about what others think about you and your work, try to build up your own opinion of yourself and your work. Once you have that, the rest will come naturally.

I used to be the same way, though on a personal level, not a professional one. Then one day I said to myself "fuck what other people think," and I've been far happier ever since.

Basically, it comes down to "Fuck other people, I'm awesome." Believe that and everything else should fall into place.

[Yian]

Thank you IcedEarth. I do feel very insecure in many situations. A lot of people have told me that I have come a long way and all I have to do is stay on the course and I will one day succeed, but it's just that so many of these works are so astounding, and I just want to be as good as them so badly that the thought that I might fail scares me easily.

I guess it has something to do with how I was raised and what kind of things I went through at school, but I really can't blame other people for what is going on in my life right now. It's just very difficult to have that self-esteem without knowing anything in life that's concrete and reliable.

[Striker]

IcedEarth summed it up fairly well. All you have to do is have more confidence in yourself and your own work, and you'll end up feeling much better overall. You even admitted yourself that your work was much better than almost everybody's that you saw, so why not be proud of that?

[LittleChief]

Thank you IcedEarth. I do feel very insecure in many situations. A lot of people have told me that I have come a long way and all I have to do is stay on the course and I will one day succeed, but it's just that so many of these works are so astounding, and I just want to be as good as them so badly that the thought that I might fail scares me easily.

I guess it has something to do with how I was raised and what kind of things I went through at school, but I really can't blame other people for what is going on in my life right now. It's just very difficult to have that self-esteem without knowing anything in life that's concrete and reliable.

Yian, I can't tell you what will make you happy, but I can tell you what will definitely make you unhappy - comparing yourself to others. It is easy to understand why people compare themselves to others though...in an echo of Oscar Wilde's famous maxim, "It is not enough that I succeed. Others must fail," research has found that personal gain is far sweeter if it's denied to others. You get a pay raise, good; your peers do not, better. Of course, you'll never be the best, the richest, or the most knowledgeable at anything - there will always be more to strive for. My advice would be to just maintain a focus on how you and your loved ones are living, and try not to care about the statuses of others in comparison to yours, and I guarantee it will be easier for you to see what really makes you happy.

[Lehesu]

Just remember, yian:

There can be miracles,
If you believe.
Although love's frail,
It's hard to kill.
(hard to kill)

[farsimon]

*stroke*

[IcedEarth]

*stroke*

[farsimon]

I actually had this kind of stroking I had in mind. With yian's floppy failwiener.

[MrBored]

Christ, thats hot.

[schnitzel_bob]

I'm sweating like a pedophile at recess (http://picnicface.com/videos.php?videoID=40).

[Yian]

Wow, that capital B looks like balls. I've never noticed that... Maddox really knows what he is doing.

[LynX]

Yian: Even the best artists out the started out drawing stick people and penises.

Most people can pump out mediocre crap, but lack the resolve and dedication needed to truly excel at art, or at anything really. There's a reason why mediocrity is the most common affliction in anything skill-related: most people aren't arsed to take the extra mile and even make sacrifices to achieve excellence.

People who make mind-bending stuff have done all the hard work at training their artistic sense, sharpening their eye for details and continuously test new techniques, styles etc.

The time you think you're pretty damn good at doing something, is the time you start to stagnate and get overtaken by people who keep improving themselves. This is the reason why "no matter how good you think you are, there's someone better than you".

This is also why an artist must be very critical of his own work, and must treat constructive criticism like it was gold that fell from the heavens, because that's what it is worth, unless you like being mediocre. An artist must brush aside praise because it really doesn't help you improve at all, and because i've seen people praising absolutely crap work with absurd adjectives like "Awesome", "stunning", "simply beautiful" etc. when in reality, it isn't even worthy of being used to wipe snot on if you compare it to work that truly deserve such descriptions.

My advice: start doing more studies and research. Study stuff not directly related to your area of interest, like matte painting, sculpting, photorealistic digital retouching etc, and look for sites like this (http://www.taylorjames.com/cgi-retouching/index.html) and study them. If you can afford it, get some professional art books and study them.

There's a mind-bogglingly large amount of helpful stuff scattered all over the Internet, and with some time and patience, you'll start picking up new stuff as you go.

Also, attitude towards working on your passion. If you feel like quitting when your best efforts can't hold a candle to another person's work, you're not doing it for the right reasons.

The 'right' way to look at it is to tell yourself that you'll top that person's work, and sooner or later, you will (provided you make the effort instead of sitting on your thumbs and wait for a miracle).
And if you see someone else's stuff is EVEN better, use that as your new benchmark.
Only when you reach the level of quality that the best artists have, do you begin to set benchmarks of your own instead of using other people's work for that.

[Dr. Von Fail]

Dude, don't sweat your balls about it too much. I haven't done shit this year. Sometimes before great shit is done, there is a period of relative absence of inspiration. So relax, observe your surroundings. If you are to really be a great artist, you won't give up.

Also, ever thought of painting people killing emo's? That would be simply godly.

[IcedEarth]

I like the way you think, Dr. Fail

[Lehesu]

Threadomancy strikes again.