Getting married young

[schnitzel_bob]

First, let me just say I don't intend to get married before 25.

Something Smap said recently got me thinking. He thinks getting married in your early twenties is a bad idea. Also, he said it's an unequal partnership, on which I'd like to hear him expand.

I worked in a very conservative christian town for several years, and saw many co-workers and their friends get married at 17,18,19. Mostly, from what I could tell, they wanted to have sex, which is probably the worst possible reason to get married. I'm very skeptical about the success rates of these marriages.

That said, if there's one thing I've learned, it's that there is no one key to successful, lasting relationships. Ultimately, something my dad told me many years ago always comes to mind: Marriage is as much about learning to live with someone for the rest of your life as it is about being in love.

Thoughts? I know a few of you are married...

[King Speedy]

Something Smap said recently got me thinking.

That was your first mistake.

[IcedEarth]

lol

But really, I think it all depends on the people involved. I got married "young" I guess you could say. I'm almost 25 and my wife just turned 23 last month. However, we both have pretty solid ideas of what we both want to do indiviually and with our partner. We're both very much on the same page and deeply in love. We lived together for 6 months before we got married. And no, that was definitely not a "honeymoon" phase. We actually had quite a lot to work through. We have fights of course but we both are the type to get an issue resolved and get back to having fun rather than letting it drag on and bring us down. For these reasons, among many others, I believe we will be just fine. We're both realists though and realize that for whatever reason down the road, it is possible that we could end up divorcing. Just so nobody thinks we're naiive. :P

[Hobbes874]

I think people who get married out of High School are fucking nuts. There is no way I could've handled that at that age. Right now I'm 23 and getting married sounds quite scary, something I don't wanna think about 'till I'm at least out of Uni and actually able to support myself.

All those kids who get married at like 18 (usually Christians) probably make up 80% of the divorces down the line anyways. Lol, protecting that sanctity of marriage.

[tisl]

Marriage? What the fuck are you people thinking? Why the fuck would you get married? Yeah, companionship and all that, but it's a huge commitment that places a lot of restrictions on what you can do with your life. Freedom or death! Also, raising a child is fucking horrible.

[farsimon]

I am once again reminded of how immature this community is. Thanks for the ego boost.

[Smapdey]

I think it's a bad idea mostly because I personally feel too immature to get married at age 23. I couldn't possibly raise children right now, and not just because I'm financially insecure, but because I'd make a terrible father. I'd been with the same woman for four years now, and she feels the same way about herself being a terrible mother. Frankly, I think people should wait to get married and have children because the ages of 18-24 should be used for fucking off and figuring out what you want to do with your life, not getting tied down early. Maybe some people think they have more of a grip on life than I do and feel up to the task, but I certainly don't. I like drinking, smoking, sleeping in and not having to worry about anyone else.

As for it being an unequal institution, in the United States currently there's a lot of talk about the evils of homosexuality and if gay marriage becomes legal then people will want to marry horses and toasters and the whole concept of marriage will be destroyed and an invisible man in the sky will kick everyone's ass. This is the excuse used to systematically deny rights and discriminate against a minority because we find their sexual habits frighteningly dissimilar to our own and gay people are a better scapegoat for pedophilia than Catholicism (even though the vast majority of pedophiles are heterosexual). It's all a bunch of bullshit, and I don't want to be on the side exercising a right denied to another group of people for no good reason.

The best reasons to get married are all tax related anyways, like filing jointly when there's a huge disparity between your incomes. Marriage is largely a legal decision and one I think a lot of people can put off until their thirties.

[Hobbes874]

Marriage? What the fuck are you people thinking? Why the fuck would you get married? Yeah, companionship and all that, but it's a huge commitment that places a lot of restrictions on what you can do with your life. Freedom or death! Also, raising a child is fucking horrible.
Like Smapdey said, tax benefits (at least in the U.S) make up a pretty nice chuck of change.

[schnitzel_bob]

My sense it that nothing properly prepares you to be a parent. Also, is it just me or have all of Farsimon's posts lately basically been him making a smug comment and dissapearing for a month?

[RAY16]

My sense it that nothing properly prepares you to be a parent. Also, is it just me or have all of Farsimon's posts lately basically been him making a smug comment and dissapearing for a month?

Well, you probably shouldn't get married any time soon. You can't even commit to an IRC channel.


[12:39] * Schnitzel has joined #atrip
[12:50] * Schnitzel Quit (Quit: http://www.mibbit.com ajax IRC Client)
[12:59] <RAY16> What an impatient faggot.
[01:01] <Smapdey> Bastard.
[01:01] <Smapdey> He didn't even say anything.
[01:03] <RAY16> Seriously.


...¬_¬

[schnitzel_bob]

Eh, you guys weren't talking! What, was I supposed to start something?!

[IcedEarth]

Start a fight! Or a gangbang! Or something!

[unskinnybob]

Jesus! Smapdey? I'm going to have to start trolling again. There goes my marriage.

[jerymac]

Everyone tells me that my boyfriend and i shouldn't get married quite yet. We're planning on getting married when i'm 19 and he's 21. We are both each others first kiss, and we've never had sex out of respect for each others wishes to keep our wedding night pure.