epsilon
June 7th, 2007, 03:23 AM
I don't believe in God, some supernatural being who is watching over us. I believe in balance; being a good person and a bad one when it is necessary. But I think I have just had an epiphany. At this moment, I am watching The Jim Bakkers Show on this Christian channel and I think I want to become a Christian. This Jim person enlightened me with the word of God. He said that accepting Jesus Christ as your lord and savior is what everyone should do, because it will truly make one a better person and as an improved person one’s life will become better. He said that if one accepts God Almighty! Oh Praise Jesus ! Then one will sore as high as an eagle, for a small donation of 1,000 dollars. Christianity sounds so promising, but I don’t have that kind of money, but not to worry! Jim has told me that I should accept God even if I don’t have the money; he said 20 or 30 dollars will do! This man has deeply inspired me to reach deep into my pockets and give! Give! GIVE! Give my twenty dollars to Jim and his wonderful community! He said I shouldn’t feel guilty that I have only so little to give; I should feel blessed, because every penny helps. Of course Jim is waiting for that one miracle, the biggest one, the most special one, the one person who will give him 1,000 dollars!
Now folks, Jimmy didn’t just talk about money, he IS not a greedy and selfish person, he also talked about flying. Accepting GOD will set you free! And you will be able to fly just like a bird! Speaking of those beautiful creatures of God, Jimmy talked about the time he saw ducks flying over a prison, in which he stayed for a few years because in his past life, before accepting GOD; he committed a felony which he would not speak of in detail. He said that these birds are showing us the way to live! He said that he saw one of the birds separate from the flock because it was injured, so it landed on the ground to regain strength. And you know what happened? One of the birds flew down and took care of the injured bird until it was ready to fly again. As it recuperated, both birds rejoined their flock and they sang. They sang beautifully and Jim knew what their message was, he knew what they were singing about. He said they were singing “Just keep on going, don’t stop, don’t give up, and praise Jesus Christ!”
At this point I realized something; Jim is not just a good religious person, but old Jimmy is also a bird whisperer. He has shown me the way to Jesus and the path is clear. Now folks, there is one obstacle though. And that obstacle is my sins that I must cleanse before continuing on my path to salvation. I must repent my sins; I must reveal all the horrible sinful things that I have done in my life. I must tell everything to a stranger and God will forgive me. I will do so tomorrow morning when I go to the nearest church for the first time in my sin filled life, but I know that I am going with a purpose. When I am done and I transform into a completely new person, I will go home and I won’t forget to pray to Jesus before I go to bed. I know that if I pray everything will be alright, because praying is the act of doing nothing but feeling like you have accomplished something.
Accept Jesus. Everything that I have said is true after all.
Now folks, Jimmy didn’t just talk about money, he IS not a greedy and selfish person, he also talked about flying. Accepting GOD will set you free! And you will be able to fly just like a bird! Speaking of those beautiful creatures of God, Jimmy talked about the time he saw ducks flying over a prison, in which he stayed for a few years because in his past life, before accepting GOD; he committed a felony which he would not speak of in detail. He said that these birds are showing us the way to live! He said that he saw one of the birds separate from the flock because it was injured, so it landed on the ground to regain strength. And you know what happened? One of the birds flew down and took care of the injured bird until it was ready to fly again. As it recuperated, both birds rejoined their flock and they sang. They sang beautifully and Jim knew what their message was, he knew what they were singing about. He said they were singing “Just keep on going, don’t stop, don’t give up, and praise Jesus Christ!”
At this point I realized something; Jim is not just a good religious person, but old Jimmy is also a bird whisperer. He has shown me the way to Jesus and the path is clear. Now folks, there is one obstacle though. And that obstacle is my sins that I must cleanse before continuing on my path to salvation. I must repent my sins; I must reveal all the horrible sinful things that I have done in my life. I must tell everything to a stranger and God will forgive me. I will do so tomorrow morning when I go to the nearest church for the first time in my sin filled life, but I know that I am going with a purpose. When I am done and I transform into a completely new person, I will go home and I won’t forget to pray to Jesus before I go to bed. I know that if I pray everything will be alright, because praying is the act of doing nothing but feeling like you have accomplished something.
Accept Jesus. Everything that I have said is true after all.